summer summer.

how you slip by me, you stealthy bastard.

of interest, of late:

in the far-reaches of brooklyn, i saw a huge empty storefront that had a 'grand opening!!!' sign on one side, and a 'for lease' sign on the other - as if in the short space of window, one entrepreneur managed to live out his narrative arc from birth to death of a salesman.

gazing from one end of a subway car to the other, i saw a devout, muttering hasidic, and a giant african american dad with 2 small kids, blue dreadlocks, white contacts, and vampire teeth. as different as they were, both were doing all they could to transport themselves to different realities with their looks and actions. too bad they both had to actually transport themselves on the mundane 2 train.

up at rockaway beach, i overheard a group of early twenty-somethings spouting off ignorant musings about thirty-somethings. ignorance without malice of course - just plain old, genuine stuff you would say if you didn't know any thirty-somethings at all. i remember doing the same thing at their age. now i just judge without malice (ish) - they were drinking boon's wine coolers. and reading cosmo.

those are three snippets for now. back to pretentious musings soon.

oh, july.

and that is less lament, more surprised statement. june snuck past me somehow, even though it was a stomper.

and by stomper i mean loud, and messy, and full of thunderstorms and lightning and enlightening moments that left me not a all enlightened, but muddled and puddled, and maybe a touch befuddled.

don't get me wrong, it was fun. there was karaoke and bowling and beer at tile bar. there was a funny beach party with a bouncy castle and coffee in the park and glorious walks to and from work in a summery-soggy haze. but there were also innumerable work headaches and at least one small heartache. and then there was the ambiguity and the awkwardity, which of course isn't a word, but should be one. all in all, june was an odd duck, one to be vaguely remembered or vaguely forgotten, depending on the day.

and now july. and a realization that i constantly pitter patter about the passing of time. every month it's 'can't believe it's already (this month)!' is it a perpetual yearning for what's next or what was before, or just the inability to sit still and enjoy what's happening at this very moment?

i don't know. but i know of at least one song that captures this perfectly. 'the wait' by built to spill. i think it's been reading my mail:

you wait for darkness, then you wait for day...you wait for august then you wait for may...

you wait for something that'll make the waiting worth the wait.

oh, july - you will be worth waiting for.